Look: No one likes to miss their goals. No one. But there are some of us who miss our goals and move on to the next one, and there are some of us who miss our goals and spend a lot of time focused on that failure.
And it’s probably no surprise that most of us fall in that second group.
When we don’t hit our goals or don’t manage to do what we’d planned to do, most people spend a lot of time in varying cycles of disappointment, guilt, and defeatism.
That’s perfectly natural.
But just because it’s natural doesn’t mean it’s optimal.
Shifting Your Mindset Around Setbacks
How you view setbacks says more about you than it does about the actual outcome. Let’s say a copywriter was working very hard to hit their first $10,000 month. The end of the month rolls around and they’ve managed to hit $9,500.
This might be tempting for them to view as a failure.
At the same time, another copywriter who’s working hard to hit their first $1,000 month would see that $9,500 as a MASSIVE success.
So, the first thing to realize is that quote-unquote failure is all relative.
Failure is just a story you’re telling yourself.
And you have the power to change that story.
Setbacks Aren’t a Reflection of You
Experiencing a setback doesn’t mean that there is something wrong with you. You may have failed to meet a goal, but that doesn’t mean that you as a person are a failure. One of the worst things we can do is to make an external condition affect how we think of ourselves.
A failure is simply an outcome and, as a less-than-perfect outcome, it’s an opportunity to learn.
Think of everything you do in your business as an experiment. Every spec ad you create, every rate negotiation you go through, every pitch email you send out—everything.
And the results of those experiments let you know whether you should continue with things as-is or whether you should change elements of your experiment.
For example, let’s say you craft a basic pitch letter and then customize it for 50 different companies. You send out that email and don’t get replies from anyone.
Is that a failure? I’m sure, initially, it’ll feel like it. But it’s really feedback on your experiment. This is your chance to reevaluate and revise your pitch letters, make sure you’re targeting the right people in organizations, and make sure the elements in your pitch are as compelling as can be.
What you might have previously viewed as failures are opportunities to do a full debrief on what you’ve done and improve it so that you can have better results next time.
The fact of the matter is that actions or ventures or steps that you take that aren’t huge successes aren’t failures, they’re learning opportunities.
What you might have previously called a failure is only truly a failure if you let it stop you from moving forward!
Try, learn, revise, and try again.
Watch More
On episode 35 of the Build Your Copywriting Business podcast, Nicki and Kate dig into two reasons why some copywriters fail. The first reason copywriters fail is because they don’t have training. If you don’t know how to do what it is you say it is you know how to do, then you’re setting yourself up for inevitable failure. It’s like a “pilot” who goes to fly a plane but never actually got the training to become a pilot.
The other reason? Watch to hear. It’s not what you think it is since the only way to truly fail is by giving up and quitting.
Your Turn!
How can you reframe something that you might have called a “failure” in the past? What could it mean instead? Let me know in the comments below!
Last Updated on July 13, 2023
Nicki,
I appreciate what you have stated here, so very true.
Zig Ziglar once said that, “Failure is an event, not a person.” Then he would go on to say, “yesterday really did end last night and today is a brand new day!”
We have all experienced failures, or rather we should call them learning opportunities. In fact Thomas Edison learned 1000 ways to not build a light bulb! Many of us have forgotten how to “cut our teeth” doing anything worthwhile, yet those that do experience the pain and persevere, typically do find success.
Hi Marc,
That’s a great quote! And I agree – as adults, we’ve mostly forgotten what it feels like to fall down and get back up again without blaming ourselves or giving up on something. Imagine if we’d gone down the whole “failure” spiral each time we’d tried to walk as children! Most of us have to relearn that persistence and willingness to fall before we succeed.
Thanks for commenting!
Nicki
My goal for this year is to start valuing myself more as a person and asa professional. Right now, that feels lonely, sometimes, and very exposed. But I am also learning and growing fast and with determination and conviction, for the first time in my life.
Hi Ariadne,
Those are fantastic goals! Good for you. It definitely can feel lonely and uncomfortable, but stick with it — you’ll be so much happier on the other side once these things become a habit. One thing I find helpful is to ask myself how a best friend would speak to me and then try to take that tone with myself. 🙂
Thanks for commenting!
Nicki
I had a professor way back in 1986 who asked our class to raise our hands if we had ever made a mistake. Every hand went up. He then told us that because we REMEMBERED those mistakes, we were learning more from our mistakes than from all the times we succeeded the first time. He encouraged us to keep making more mistakes so that we could learn more. He really helped shift my perspective.
My challenge is to find a way to let go of my financial fears and trust that the process will bring money when I need it. I love the process of learning, experimenting, getting feedback from others, and gradually growing my skill set. But I have terror that I won’t be skilled enough to start bringing in the kind of money I want to maintain my current standard of living (and it really isn’t a fancy lifestyle!). My fear gets in the way of convincing people that they should hire me and at the price I deserve. I know I deserve a good income, but I become afraid that I cannot convince others that I deserve it. So, I will work on viewing my money worries and fear that others will devalue me as a big mistake! It is a mistake I can start learning from today. May it be so!
Hi Susan,
You’re definitely not alone in worrying that you’re not “deserving” of a client’s payment – but you’ll start to feel more and more confidence in yourself the more you practice writing copy. There is no “perfect” when it comes to copy, but when you start to get more comfortable crafting effective copy, you’ll also start to get more comfortable with the idea of finding and pitching clients and commanding a rate you deserve. 🙂
Thanks for commenting!
Nicki
“For example, let’s say you craft a basic pitch letter and then customize it for 50 different companies. You send out that email and don’t get replies from anyone.”
I have had exactly this failure; right down to the number of letters sent.
Best feedback I’ve ever had. It taught me to alter my path. 🙂
Hi Mike,
Absolutely! And that feedback leads to better pitches—and more clients.
Thanks for commenting!
Nicki
I think you may have just discovered the key to happiness!
Thanks for sharing 🙂
Hi Nicole,
Ha – well, it certainly can help us get on the right path! 🙂
Thanks for commenting!
Nicki